Derailed (2005)

Wow, where's Something Weird when you need them? This slick, sleazy noirsploitation (made extra-slimy by the sheen of big-budget Hollywood polish) would be right up that company's alley if it had been released in the late '50s like it should have been. Somehow, even attempting to make this material into a film seems desperately stupid, which is appropriate since the film itself is indeed both desperate and stupid. What's especially irritating is that the film refuses to acknowledge its own sleaziness -- if it would just get down in the muck with the rest of us, it might actually be fun. Speaking of fun, Vincent Cassel is having plenty -- he waltzes in with this air of "Oh, zees eez crap and I know eet eez crap so I will be having zee fun with eet and fuck zee rest of you," and while in a better film this attitude would be destructive (i.e. his turn in Ocean's Twelve), here he's the only one who takes this film at the level it belongs on. How Clive Owen and Jennifer Aniston got convinced that this was high drama rather than the logic-free potboiler it is probably involves Herzog-style hypnosis. What's amusing is that this film is the flagship release from the Weinsteins' new company, since back in the day Miramax would send two or three films like this a month straight to video. I guess once your lead actress has fucked Brad Pitt, you can get anything done. Note to RZA: Stay behind the camera in the future unless someone comes to you with a role that doesn't involve you being a streetwise ex-con.

Grade: D