Mindhunters (2005)

So we're all good people. We know we should eat right, exercise, things like that. But deep down inside, every now and then we get cravings. Cravings that we know we should ignore, but somehow we can't. Myself, I happen to really like crullers. I try to eat good food for breakfast -- oatmeal, farina, healthful cold cereal, bagels, the occasional egg. But every now and then, I just gotta capitulate. At that point, I will go to Dunkin' Donuts and get myself a cruller. Or occasionally a Boston Creme, but usually crullers because they're light enough that I don't feel too bad about it but they're still sweet enough to feel decadent. Why do I bring this up? Because dammit, that's what Mindhunters is -- it's Cruller Cinema. I wish I could defend why I feel so sweet on a film rife with problems, a film that isn't any less stupid than something like The Nameless or Blade: Trinity. The best I can say is that Mindhunters may be junk, but it's fast and fun junk. It blazes by like a rocket, fully aware of the purpose it serves and content to be nothing more than empty-calorie filmic enjoyment. Renny Harlin is a hack, but (Exorcist: The Beginning not withstanding) he's a hack who knows his place in the world, and he knows how to make trash that shines like gold. I begrudge him nothing, and I feel no shame for my enjoyment of this. It's just that good.

Grade: B